Tony's dedication to empowering the single Christian continues to uplift my spirits as I am validated in God's word and his plan for me.
When it comes to the "dating" lifestyle, I am quickly realizing that my experiences with the 4 "incomplete dates" that occurred this past season are no coincidence. I say "incomplete" because 3 out of four dates left me all dressed up with nowhere to go! Literally stood up four times. Embarrassing I know.
Four different individuals who once realized that I am a devout Woman of God have just "disappeared" from my life. Like smoke, they just vanished from existence... I won't go into detail but I know that after my last encounter with someone who literally told me that to mess up with me would be setting himself up to feel the wrath of God made me realize that the Holy Spirit meant it when it was whispered in my ear last week...
Protection Not Rejection!
If you have been on my site or if this is your first time, you will quickly understand that I have chosen to be single out of Love and not hate for my husband of 30 years.
I realize that my story in itself is an anomaly to most. Especially for a Latina woman. I mean, most of us "stick it out" in toxic marriages even if it KILLS us!
However, I know that in my heart, I am not the only one who has lived through similar "love stories" or might still be in one. If you are, I encourage you to send me an email and connect with my facebook to encourage one another.
But this post is not about the past, it is about the future...my future and perhaps your future too if my story resonates with you.
My life as I feel my way as a single woman in the "dating" world also does not reflect what most will imagine as "Single, Bilingual and Ready to Mingle" or "Sex in the City".
Unlike the norm, my spirit no longer hungers for the fast food attitudes of filling a need for pleasure. Without much effort, an attitude to "Re-Sanctify" my body as a Vessel for God has been my calm thus far.
That is not to say that I am no longer interested in the joys of dating or sexual intimacy. It's been 3 years of sleeping alone, not having a companion at events and witnessing the transformation of health and clarity within my estranged husband. Yes, he is alive, living well and even surviving cancer with a holistic treatment in Mexico (ALL WHILE LIVING 200 ft FROM THE BEACH, might I add)...He is definitely being taken care of by God and I venture to say, "found his purpose while finding his peace and love for life".
GOD IS SO AWESOME! I am so grateful to have been obedient enough to be in the word during those very dark times to hear the word of God speak to me. This would not have been a happy ending if I had maintained silent about his suicidal desires.
With that being said, I am happy and melancholy often. I know that I did what I did for Love and I know that the love that we share will never ever die. However, the marriage was unequally yoked from the start, trying for 30 years to build a fruitful future proved to be futile and like the tree mentioned in John 15:2-6, our marriage needed much pruning.
"Every branch in Me that does not bear fruit, He takes away; and every branch that bears fruit, He prunes it so that it may bear more fruit. "You are already clean because of the word which I have spoken to you. "Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear the fruit of itself unless it abides in the vine, so neither can you unless you abide in Me."
I encourage you to listen to Tony Evans today as you prepare for your weekend. I was validated in knowing that by raising my Standards for a companion, I am finally replacing those low expectations of mine when it comes to the love and respect that I deserve. If God is all I need to bring me joy right now, then I will rejoice in His Love until He sends me someone to appreciate this Vessel of mine.